Joy Of Cooking Stuffing Recipe
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Recipe for Recharging During Thanksgiving Holiday
Stress. It’s killing you, right? Paperwork is due; the kids have the sniffles (Is it H1N1? Gasp!); your co-worker is the devil’s liege; there’s a student you can’t seem to reach… I really could write an entire column about the different situations that cause us stress, but that would take all day, and I’d have to double up on the Prozac for that one.
The question is… how do we reduce stress and find a way to chill out over the Thanksgiving holiday?
(A few more notes on stress here, I recognize that some of us cook for 27 and others go out for Chinese; some pack up the minivan and the kids and travel over the river and through the woods to spend a delightful weekend with the INLAWS while others sit at home in front of the fire with a good book; some go out the day after Thanksgiving and fight the crowds and little old ladies with brick-like handbags for a few bucks off the hottest gift, while others are nearly comatose from too much turkey.)
Regardless of your holiday routine, here is my recipe for recharging your batteries over this blessed long weekend. As in almost all my recipes, first you need to go to the store and buy a few supplies.
Step 1: Purchase the following ingredients:
1 bottle of liquid bubble bath and/or those neat Vaseline crystals that turn the water blue.
1 bottle of red wine, please don’t buy Merlot. A simple Cabernet or Pinot Noir will due.
(If you don’t approve of wine, you can skip this step, but I seriously recommend it.)
Note: White wine is not a substitute.
3 of those movie-size boxes of your favorite candy. They sell them at Walmart for $1.
Some chocolate. I prefer truffles.
A mind-less magazine
Step 2: Gather the following items from around your house:
1 warm, snuggly blanket.
1 pair comfy jammies
Fire wood (recommended only if you have a fireplace.)
1 pair walking shoes.
The nicest wineglass you own.
A cardigan with pockets
Step 3: The process.
First of all, and this is very important, you are to do NO LAUNDRY over the Thanksgiving holiday. I don’t care if you really love junior, and he is only home once a year… he can do his own laundry. He should be THANKFUL that he doesn’t have to go to a Laundromat to do it. The reason behind this is that laundry, my dear friend, is a journey, not a destination. It will never be done. Don’t do it. I MEAN it. I don’t care if you LIKE it. Don’t do laundry this weekend.
The first thing you need to do before the weekend even begins is hop in your own bathtub for a good bubble bath. This is the cleansing part of the recharge process, and it is very important to do this in your own tub. (Nobody likes to soak in someone else’s nasty tub. Yuk.) So if you’re leaving for the weekend, this needs to be done before you leave. You should plan to be in the tub for at least an hour. Yes, I’m SERIOUS. One hour.
Before you get in the tub, you’re going to want to get your mind-less magazine, open the forbidden chocolates, uncork that bottle of RED wine and pour a generous amount into the prettiest glass you own. Yes, use your husband’s great grandmother’s hand-etched artisan goblets. She would WANT you to. (If you don’t have a wine glass, then get yourself to the dollar store, and get the biggest one they have.)
Make the water as hot as you can stand it because in an hour it’s going to be a whole lot cooler. In fact, if you’re like me, you’ll be adding more hot water anyway.
Then relax. Drink the wine and eat the chocolate and soak and breathe for a while before you pick up the magazine. If your magazine has lots of skinny people in it, please have a Sharpie handy, because you’re going to want to draw some moustaches on those beauties. They’re all airbrushed anyway, so have another piece of chocolate and love yourself.
Okay, so now you’re calm and relaxed. The next thing you need to do is cork that bottle of RED wine, because we’re going to need it later. Put on your sweater with pockets and open one of the boxes of your favorite candy. For my sister it would be Hot Tamales. I would choose Lemonheads. My mom is a miniature Reese’s cup kind of a lady, while my son would probably choose Hershey’s kisses. Put the box of candy in your cardigan. You are going to be wearing this sweater all weekend. Every time you think of your co-worker or the unfinished stack of paperwork or the looming deadline or the stresses of your life, you are going to pop a piece of that candy into your mouth and let it MELT in your mouth. You will taste its sweet goodness and push your problem from your mind.
The next required part of the program is a walk outdoors. Leave your cell phone at home. (I realize that so far my treatment has included lots of treats, but this walk is not intended as a punishment.) Put on your walking shoes and find a path through the woods. Breathe deeply. Be sure your path has plenty of fallen leaves. There’s something satisfying about kicking through dry leaves and hearing them crunch under your feet. As an added bonus, they smell great, too. (Perhaps this isn’t as satisfying as throwing plates across a room and hearing them smash into a thousand pieces, but there’s virtually no clean-up in leaf crunching, while plate-smashing requires some work on your part.) Every time you think about your stresses on your PEACEFUL walk, pop a piece of candy and let it melt. Find a rock or a footbridge to sit on and just sit there in silence. All religions (I’m Christian, by the way.) encourage silence. Listen. Pray. Meditate. Whatever. Just sit there and don’t think about anything.
So about now you’re wondering…. What do I do with that corked bottle of RED wine. I know, it calls out to you, doesn’t it? Well, here’s what you do, you’re going to drink a glass while you cook. It feels glamorous. Really. Try it. You may be stuffing oyster dressing up a turkey’s hiney, but you’re doing it holding a wineglass elegantly. Play your favorite music… or better yet, play the Partridge Family Christmas Album… joyfully. Burn scented candles all around you, the cinnamon or pumpkin variety.
Do NOT clean your house while the food is cooking. I really don’t care if your husband’s boss is coming over. Your children or, God forbid, your husband can take care of the cleaning, and if the cleaning doesn’t get done, who really cares? Isn’t your house going to be trashed by the end of the weekend with everyone home and no laundry getting done? Just let it go. Your guests didn’t come to see your perfect house and be surrounded by perfect people. They came to spend time with YOU and those little heathens that keep taking their socks off and leaving them on the living room floor. You will be a much better hostess if you are relaxed and not worried about the clutter. A better use of your time would be to set up a game, like Apples to Apples or Pictionary to play after dinner.
And for heaven’s sake, don’t do the dishes right after you’ve eaten. Haven’t you been cooking all day? Give yourself a break.
The day after Thanksgiving, you need to build a fire, put on your jammies and get out your blanket. Better yet, don’t you have a child who enjoys setting things on fire? Let HIM build your fire. (We all have one, honey. It doesn’t mean you have parenting issues. We’re being REAL here.) Lay on the couch. Don’t go out to the Black Friday sales. Just take the day for yourself. You can get the same deals online with no shipping charges. I promise. Watch Christmas Vacation on t.v. while you finish off the bottle of RED wine in front of the crackling fire and remember to breathe deeply. If you have a dog, this is a good time to snuggle with him. He loves you most of all.
By the time you go back to work on Monday, fresh ideas will germinate in that relaxed brain of yours. You’ll be rested and ready to return to the grind, only it won’t seem like such a grind because you have taken care of yourself, pampered yourself and reduced stress.
And as in all good shampoo commercials, my suggestion for the following weekend is: Rinse and Repeat as needed.
Mary Calhoun Brown, Author
There Are No Words
www.marycalhounbrown.com
About the Author
Mary Calhoun Brown is the award-winning author of There Are No Words, due out Feb. 2010. Brown is an educator and autism advocate. She is available to speak to conferences, small groups and classrooms. More information about Brown is available on her web site www.marycalhounbrown.com.
joy of cooking stuffing recipe